We are currently in the midst of developing #1’s toilet training ethic (regulation of ones and twos). She has on many varied occasions been successful at her potty practice. The day care provider focuses on this behavior and routinely escorts #1 to the restroom throughout the course of any given school day. And much to our chagrin, she is very diligent at using the potty while she is at school, because this is not the case when we are home.
There is a simple albeit crude fact that daughter #1 has a nightly bowel movement with Swiss precision. This nightly event has been a recent point of conflict between #1 and me. At nearly the same point every evening, roughly and hour after dinner and an hour prior to bath/bed time, #1 begins to demonstrate the behaviors that are evident of her about to make a deposit in her pants. She knows it. I know it. Then begins the standoff…
“Do you need to go potty, #1?” I ask.
“Yes, Daddy,” she predictably replies.
“Well let’s go. I will help you,” I respond.
“Daddy, I need to get ________ first” she states. Now the blank space is an indication that she will simply come up with some sort of menial, unnecessary task or errand to distract attention away from the previous lines of dialogue. This will then lead to #1 disappearing to another room under the guise that she is completing the aforementioned task when she is actually dropping the inevitable deuce.
This leads to a frustrating conversation between #1 and me about why she would not simply walk the extra 15 feet to use the potty rather than go in her diaper. I explain the merits of not having to carry your waste right next to your person, and #1 will state that she does not need to use the potty because Daddy will take care of the aftermath. As you may imagine, it is essentially a futile debate.
Therefore, I decided in my infinite parental wisdom, that I would instate a reward-per-use program that will reward #1 for successful potty habits—Stickers. Now as an adult, we all realize that a small speck of paper with an adhesive backing really holds no value, but to a 2 ½ year old, stickers might as well be gold doubloons.
I have created a merit based chart that rewards one sticker for water and two stickers for a solid. These stickers will then allow daughter #1 to garner a larger collection of stickers on her “potty chart” that can be traded for bigger and better prizes i.e. trip to the toy store, arcade for an afternoon of skeeball, etc.
So far I do not believe that she really appreciates the simplicity of the system and the ease of getting a great reward. I did the math, and just today based on my program, I believe I could have earned a round of mini-golf and a bag of M&M’s—but alas, I am ineligible to participate.
Stay tuned for hopeful tales of potty success stories.
